✩ the war is over, and we are beginning ✩

all the living are dead and the dead are all living

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darling i'm tired, and i should be leaving
some days i really feel like talking to someone, anyone but most of the time when i get any of these moments i realise that i don't know what to say. maybe what i want to say, what i need to say can be summed up in a few words: 'i'm tired' or, 'today sucked'. naturally the response to such lines would be a concerned 'why' and then i'd find that i don't know the answer, or, perhaps, more accurately, the reasons are too many and i don't want to list them all. i guess there are days when i just want to tell someone how i'm feeling without having to address the reason behind these emotions. it actually sounds kind of cowardly to me, y'know, avoidance of issues and all that, but idk, i'm scared of a great many things.

the past few days have been draining which is strange because i haven't even been very busy recently, and all in all my life hasn't been going particularly badly. ct grades weren't fabulous but with the exception of chem everything else was okay, even kind of good (if i do say so myself, hee). the last NAPFA of my life is OVER AND DONE WITH. i've fixed my cracked phone screen, finished my math and chem homework and watched 2 movies in the past week. also, chicago this friday! so everything actually seems pretty fine and dandy - i just felt a bit gloomy on the way home today. thank god a bath fixed that, i feel better now. :)

anyway the recent university/career talks have got me all worried. :( it's quite mindblowing to know that in a year's time i would have been done with my A levels and received my results. i feel old! i miss rg, when i didn't have to worry so much about the future.

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Sorry I wound up not finding you today bb! Anyway Ningning I just wanted to say I love you many many *hug* ♥

aw ning i miss youuuuuu :(
and re your first para, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN hehh.

i love you v much ningcompoop ♥

and ditto your first para, so if you ever want to talk you can find me and if you don't wanna think about why i will listen!! yeah life is just so tiring and thinking about the future is overwhelming and even though i hardly see you in school knowing that you are my friend makes life better :)

everything will be okay in the end

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